Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Finding Home


There I was, a mere four months ago, packing my bags once again for another endeavor of discovery and a search for all the right sensations and the sticky adhesive that was nirvana, here on Earth, tucked away somewhere in the Rockie Mountains or in a chasm somewhere along the Pacific highway. I saw crystal clear, 'Man of the Wild', lving off the land like some troll beckoning tourists for company, while spending my nights as a whisper in a tranquil firmament of thrusting erosion. There wasn't any certain place I had in mind, be it the meadows in the Dakotas where I declared I would die, or the icy peaks of Colorado and the crisp feel of natural eloquence holding the skin like some sort of gelatin massaging wet suit. I strived to get lost in those woods until I felt the frigid essence that the early summer snowpatches were still capable of radiating unto your shivering bodt cuddled up next to them. Things were looking up in my search for a passage into a sublime oblivion, a little more of this and little more of that and I'd have my homestead, I'd have a reason to never return. So we moved on up through Wyoming where the Tetons help to absorb some of Yellowstone's overwhelming maginificient, but those woods are no place for man, modern man at least, to make a home of, it would be impeding the modern natural order of things, my species has alkready claimed too much, but secretly I knew it would only be a matter of time before I convinced myself that I was "one" with the bear or moose, in denial of the fact that I was only dinner. So we left the grand scale of beauty behind and went through the smooth rolling hills of Montana and moved on to Washington, which I found to be as close to a New England home in the Northwest, Port Angeles, was basically Bangor but it was too gray and too rainy and I only find my morose moods so pleasurable because they last for a day or two in Mass. but your pushing a week maybe two consecutively along the Washington Peninsula. I was losing hope and fearing the expiration of my wanderlust, it had been 6 weeks of 'we're never leaving here, nope, staying right here, under this tree until this campground ain't free no more.' Oregon's allure was the greatest of all, you had cities that were small towns in disguise, river traffick in the hiot sun of every type of person imaginable floating along on their pool float, ten minutes from the city center, drinking beers and having their children paddle while everyone waved to the nudists for the mile long liberation stretch and I felt like we found it, until we checked the bankroll and took into consideration, finding some job to earn enough to get a place, while living in the car in a city with not one single free parking spot. California was all anybody has ever said it to be and that was why we couldn't stake land there and because I had this chronic paranoia that my girlfriend was in love with this weed growing commune dweller, who I envied as well and so I had uys moving on, shooting down that coast until we got to a spot of impossible relocation, San Francisco looking for at least a grand for a one bedroom. There was still hope of that soul mnagnet placed under ground somewhere on this great American plane, I could fill its tickle or maybe that was the west coasts icy night mi9st which I realized it was because once we turned east we hit the desert and at that point we wanted nothing more than to hit 80 and cruise back through those 3,000 miles and find the soothing spots we know along the river in Townsend and the hypnotic sound of the Kangusmangas. And when we finally got here, I regretted being so critical of my northeast lqandscape, granted we don't have 15,000 foot peaks or rivers that will swallow you on any given day but you have to love that fat Merrimack and we might not be able to get lost and stand on a cliff and see a blood red sun be swept away from us, but New England is beautiful and warm with people who speak fast and love hard. It is modest and mysterious, looking for no acclaim just breathing and relaxing, like the wiser, older brother not looking for any attention just an appreciation. I guess I found, that I've always had a home.

11 comments:

Lord Cohen said...

You're right no matter how far I've gotten from N. England I always end up coming back. It has it's own allure.

daverain said...

Very descriptive. I like the idea of going out to escape MA and after travelling, coming back with a new appreciation for it.

Cali-Veda said...

New England has it's appeal, but I would take California over it anyday.

Jessica said...

Very intriguing. At some point in time, I think we all want to escape where we come from. I believe that New Englanders are a special "breed" of people. We can endure the winters, have the appreciation of spring and summer... and can complain about the weather at any season and relate it to the winter, even when it's 90 degrees outside.

Joe W said...

I really enjoyed reading this blog. It makes me wish I got to travel more often. I don't want to leave New England, but it would be fascinating to learn about other areas.

rpeire02 said...

I live in New Hampshire and absolutely love it. More so the White Mountains than my own home town, but the love is still there. The only other place I've ever dreamt about living is Ireland.

Swifftopher said...

A long time ago a friend of mine went to Bermuda for a family vacation, and while there he met up with a local, an ex-patriot, and had some drinks. During the convorsation, my friend asked him what made him decide to make his permanant residence Bermuda. The man responded, "if you go on vacation, and after 3 weeks you DON'T wanna go home, you're not living in the right place." I guess it's the same idea here. Although we can always go where the grass is temporarily greener, home will always be home.

fashionably smitten said...

I agree with cali-veda, I would take California. While it is beautiful here there isn't much nice things to say about the people here. I find it very important to live in a place that is both beauitful and accepting to everyone.

Taryn said...

You are a really great writer and I can imagine how awesome it was to travel and explore all of the different parts of the U.S. I love New England and I can't imagine a better place to call my home.

Krowness said...

I agree with everything, until I remember that once I come back to NE, there's snow.

Michelle said...

I was born in San Francisco and spent a good portion of my childhood there. I didn't move to MA until I was nine. I thought snow was cool at first but then I got sick of it. I would really like to go back someday.